A few years ago, my son graduated from college with an accounting degree. This was a momentous occasion for us as he never really loved school (ok, I’ll be honest, love is a bit too strong of a word here. Let’s just say he tolerated school). After all the celebrations were over, our expectation as parents was that he would find a job in the accounting field, get some experience, and continue to grow in the field. Instead, after working for about a year, I had the following conversation with him:
Me: How’s it going at work?
My son: It’s ok, but I think I’d like to join the Army.
Me: What??? (nearly causing me to spit my morning coffee across the room) What about accounting?
My son: I realized in my junior year that I didn’t like it, but I thought it was too late to change my major at that point. I want to join the Army.
All I could think about was the thousands of dollars we put into his schooling and why the Army? Isn’t there something safer, like a personal trainer? For weeks, I tried to talk him out of it, all to no avail. I was fighting a losing battle and my stress level was rising.
It was then that my co-host/friend, Sandra, reminded me that sometimes it’s best to just go with it rather than resist (of course, she put it in a far more eloquent way with a wonderful flowing river analogy, but my bad paraphrasing may have to suffice for the moment).
We’ve all been in this type of situation before. In our minds, we know exactly what “should” happen and how it will all work out, but of course, the people (and sometimes pets) in our lives have other ideas. And if I am completely honest, I’d say that most of the time, things don’t go entirely to plan.
What happens then?
We have 2 choices. We can either try to use our Darth Vader-like powers to force the other party to see things our way (which won’t exactly make you a particularly fun or popular person to be around!) or we can roll with it.
Have you ever noticed that the more you push, the more others push back? (Confirmation that Newton’s law of opposing forces applies to people too!).
“A tree that is unbending, is easily broken.” - Lao Tzu
I’m going to assume that you’d rather sidestep the pushing match, so let’s talk about the benefits of rolling with it.
Staying flexible makes change easier to handle
Change is inevitable. Life is constantly throwing us curveballs.
If you’re a parent, you’re probably well acquainted with ever-shifting plans. See if this sounds familiar to you...you finally made plans for a much-needed family getaway. You’ve spent hours researching just the right hotel, the sites to see, and you found plenty of things for the kids to do. Everything was perfect. Your anticipation builds as the big day approaches until finally, it’s here! You’re finishing your packing the night before your trip when your toddler walks in your room sniffling, glassy-eyed, and flushed. Your heart sinks. Step aside Newton, now it’s Murphy’s Law that applies...kids and pets tend to get sick right before you travel.
Do you still go on vacation anyway and hope for the best? Or do you look for alternatives?
It’s usually hard to shift gears when we’ve invested a lot of time into something, but it’s the less stressful route to take when things don’t go the way we had planned.
Flexibility fosters creativity
At its core, flexibility is about learning to look at things from different angles, much like a photographer or painter would do. Most of the time we feel that we instinctively know what the best solution is, but have we searched for other possible solutions? Usually, it’s in that process of searching for other solutions that we discover a more creative (and possibly even better) answer to our problem.
Flexibility helps you overcome obstacles and build resilience
We may not have control over the obstacles we face in life, but we can change how we approach them. We can learn from each failed attempt and try again while making adjustments. Or maybe there’s a completely different way to get past the hurdle. Staying flexible while working to overcome an obstacle is what allows us to keep going. It’s when we get rigid and fixated on trying to fix the problem the same way, just with more effort, that leaves us frustrated and stressed (and in the end, more likely to quit).
Women are frequently masters of flexibility. Most of us have juggled work and family for a large portion of our lives and somehow we still manage to find creative ways to handle the inevitable challenges that come along.
Flexibility plays a key role in achieving success, both personally and professionally. Want to hear how flexibility helped some of our guests through challenging situations? Check out part 1 of our Success Series on Flexibility where we highlight some of those key moments.